Monday, March 23, 2009

Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Nothin' - - Photos

Shots of “Bug” over the last 10 years.

 

Working the "Water Kart" at Blossom Festival

 

Posing in front of an L&NW engine.

 

With the "Wife Of My Youth" at a company Bingo & Steak Supper
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Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Nothin'

 

David Kirkpatrick and I at College Station

 

With Dick Waller, Albemarle Pasadena Fire Chief at Brayton Fire Field

 

Monitoring substance levels during a plant startup.

 

Working in my old office
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Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Nothin'

 

Radioing in a report at the scene of a train vs vehicle incident.

 

Conferring with Randy Lann (CC OEM Director at the time) at another train vs vehicle incident.

 

Joe Deloach snapped this photo immediately after we filmed the famous "Fat Boy In Fireball" video at TEEX/ESTI.
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Bug's Bleat - - GCF: Nothin'

Volume 11, Issue 12 Friday, March 20, 2009

Hello All,

I’ve been ill for a couple of weeks (a case of “routine” respiratory crud” went south on me) but Annette broke me out of the hospital and I’m finishing up this edition of “Da Bleat.” Thanks to my wonderful wife who insisted I get myself to the doctor and Magnolia Hospital, I’m on the mend. The folks at the hospital did a GREAT job of taking care of me and helping my body recover from this assault. Of course, I like the food there too.
~
A POX on the inventor of Daylight savings time. I’m pretty sure that’s what made me sick. Studies show that heart attacks, other illnesses and accidental deaths increase in the days after the time change. Also, people who get at least 7 hour of sleep have 1/3 less illnesses that those who get less sleep do. Fold those two facts together and you’ll see that my problems started with moving the clocks forward. I got sick two days later. And I didn’t get well like you’d have thought I would, probably because I was still tired from the time shift.
~~~~~
The Administration “floated” an idea to save money by having soldier’s private insurance pay for treatment of war related injuries. Following the public outcry, the plan was quickly withdrawn. What scares me is that no one in the administration apparently realized how their plan would be received. Do these folks live on the same planet as the rest of us?
“A veteran is someone who, at one point in his life, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America' for an amount of 'up to and including my life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.' ”
~~~~~
I’ve got a solution for the AIG “bonus” mess. Don’t tax the bonuses. Don’t make laws to govern what companies can pay their employees.
DO take back the 168 BILLION that we gave to AIG. If they’re gonna be stupid, don’t let them be stupid with our money.
~~~~~
Here are some timely quotes. They may give you a smile or a groan but their truth can’t be denied.

1. In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm and three or more is a Congress. -- John Adams
2. If you don't read the newspaper, you are uninformed; if you do read the newspaper, you are misinformed. -- Mark Twain
3. Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself. -- Mark Twain
4. I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle. -- Winston Churchill
5. A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. -- George Bernard Shaw
6. A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money. -- G. Gordon Liddy
7. Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner. -- James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)
8. Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries. -- Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University
9. Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. -- P.J. O'Rourke, Civil Libertarian
10. Government is the great fiction through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. -- Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)
11. Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it. -- Ronald Reagan (1986)
12. I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts. -- Will Rogers
13. If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free! -- P.J. O'Rourke
14. In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. -- Voltaire (1764)
15. Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you! -- Pericles (430 B.C.)
16. No man's life, liberty or property is safe while the legislature is in session. -- Mark Twain (1866)
17. Talk is cheap...except when Congress does it. -- Anonymous
18. The government is like a baby's alimentary canal with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other. -- Ronald Reagan
19. The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery. -- Winston Churchill
20. The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin. -- Mark Twain
21. The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools. -- Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)
22. There is no distinctly native American criminal class -- save Congress. -- Mark Twain
23. What this country needs are more unemployed politicians. -- Edward Langley, Artist (1928-1995)
24. A government big enough to give you everything you want is strong enough to take everything you have. -- Thomas Jefferson
25. The biggest difference between Republicans and Democrats is the spelling. -- Anonymous

Thanks to Waneta
~~~~~
The stock market seems to have stopped sliding for now and has even worked its way back up a little. But it’s gonna take a consumer stampede to get many of the industries back on sound footing. [Rail shipments of chemicals, considered a key indicator of demand for products such as fertilizer and plastics, dropped by 23.6% last week compared with a year earlier. Car loadings in the U.S. were 36,900 for the week ending March 14, compared with 48,309 a year earlier, and year-to-date rail-car chemical loadings were down 19.3% compared with the same period last year, according to the Association of American Railroads. Reuters (http://www.reuters.com/article/rbssIndustryMaterialsUtilitiesNews/idUSN1942133020090319)] Here in “LA” (Lower Arkansas), it’s been a rough period. Jobs in the Chicken industry are going away and the farmers contracted with Pilgrim are in dire financial straits. Other plants have cut back to the marrow and many employees aren’t sure whether they will have a job tomorrow or not. Several businesses here in Columbia County have lain off folks and / or have started working a reduced schedule. Lion Oil is still going strong and I thank God for that. Now, all I have to do is get back to work. Doc Murphy says I should be able to return to work on Monday, March 30.
~~~~~
New American Tea Party

There's a storm abrewin'. Sick of the midnight, closed door sessions to come up with a plan? Sick of Congress raking CEO's over the coals while they, themselves, have defaulted on their taxes? Sick of the bailed out companies having lavish vacations and retreats on our tax dollar? Sick of being told it is OUR responsibility to rescue people that, knowingly, bought more house than they could afford? I am sick of being made to feel it is my patriotic duty to pay MORE taxes. I, like all of you, am a responsible citizen. I pay my taxes. I live on a budget and I don't ask someone else to carry the burden for poor decisions I may make.
O.K. folks, here it is. You may think you are just one voice and what you think won't make a difference. Well, yes it will and YES, WE CAN!! If you are disgusted and angry with the way Washington is handling our taxes. If you are fearful of the fallout from the reckless spending of BILLIONS to bailout and "stimulate" without accountability and responsibility then we need to become ONE, LOUD VOICE THAT CAN BE HEARD FROM EVERY CITY, TOWN, SUBURB AND HOME IN AMERICA. There is a growing protest to demand that Congress, the President and his cabinet LISTEN to us, the American Citizens. What is being done in Washington is NOT the way to handle the economic free fall.
So, here's the plan. On April 1, 2009, all Americans are asked to send a TEABAG to Washington , D.C. You do not have to enclose a note or any other information unless you so desire. Just a TEABAG. Many cities are organizing protests. Your one voice will become a roar when joined with millions of others that feel the same way. Yes, something needs to be done but the lack of confidence as shown by the steady decline in the stock market speaks volumes.
An online survey showed over 90% said they would send the teabag on April 1. Why, April 1?? We want them to reach Washington by April 15. Send it to; 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. Washington , D.C. 20500.
~
Note: Most “authorities” say this is a useless exercise. The bags won’t be delivered to the White House due to security restrictions. In my opinion, they don’t have to make it to the White House mailroom to get the point across. Just sending them should be statement enough. Or, you could just send the label off the bag string. Either way, maybe the media will pick up on our frustrations.
~~~~~
On the home front, it’s been a rough two weeks. Annette and I have both had the “Crud” (Bronchitis) and haven’t felt like doing much except coughing and complaining. My Dell monitor died and WalMart didn’t have a replacement (the clerk told me that they laid off 80 employees at the warehouse and the store was having trouble getting stock in.) So I ordered one from Amazon which, since I chose the free shipping, hasn’t arrived her yet. I’m “bootlegging” this issue of “Da Bleat”.
~~~~~
Until I went into the hospital, I’d been using Annette’s computer to keep up with my face book gang. It’s been a lot of fun reading the posts from my classmates spread far and wide. Speaking of classmates, Melanie (Smith) Fujihara asked for my mother’s recipes, so I sent her a copy of the Taylor Family Cookbook (via email.) It has some of my mom’s recipes in it.
Melanie, who lives in Hawaii, turned around and sent Annette and I a HUGE box of chocolate coated macadamia nuts. We’re rationing them between us but somehow there always seems to be a lot more missing from the box after Annette gets her ration.
~~~~~
Moving is near for the Columbia County Library. The library will be closed March 23 and will reopen at 9 a.m. Monday, April 20. Books not returned by noon Saturday can be dropped off in the drive-through book drop at the new location, 2057 N. Jackson St.
~~~~~
Memories. Paula Porter shared this one with us: “James, I have to comment on The Chatterbox, also. Calvin's parents ate nearly every meal there, and that's where our kids learned their dining out skills. I would give anything for a Saltillo platter right now, but, of course, Mary Contratto would have to be serving it. Iris was always sitting in the booth with us. Iris and Mary were both so special to Jimmie, Calvin's sister, when she moved back to Magnolia.”
~~~~~
St. James Episcopal Church and First Presbyterian Church are preparing for the Lenten Soup Luncheons that will be held 11:30 a.m. to 1 p.m. every Wednesday from March 4 to April 1. The luncheons feature a simple menu of soup and bread. They will be held in the fellowship hall of First Presbyterian Church, 1417 N. Jackson. A $7 donation is requested. Proceeds will go toward the benevolence projects of both churches.
~~~~~
Our Magnolia High School Class of ‘69 40th Reunion is tentatively scheduled for June 19, 20 and 21.
~~~~~
Don’t forget to use GoodSearch [http://www.goodsearch.com/] when you search the Internet!
~~~~~
DarynKagan.com - - March 20, 2009
I about fell over when I saw today's featured story. CBS News, of all places, doing a story on folks who think positively about the economy! I think they might've been laughing a bit at folks who choose to think positively, but I'm featuring the story because I always like it when the traditional media gives up their doom and gloom reporting, even if just for a couple minutes.
Today's Story: Optimists On CBS News
Apparently, CBS News was shocked to find out there are some folks who choose to have a positive attitude. Steve Hartman set out to find these Americans like they were some strange, rare virus. What he found might just be a cure for what ails America.
Watch Video [http://darynkagan.demo.nimbussoftware.com/heroism/stories/he_090320_optimists.html]
~~~~~
America is not at war. The military is at war. - - America is at the mall, or watching the movie stars.
~~~~~
Each week the Defense Department highlights military personnel who have gone above and beyond in the war. [http://www.defenselink.mil/heroes/] - - Michael Segreaves - - Hometown: Philipsburg, PA - - Awarded: Bronze Star

In the late morning of May 8, 2004, a 30-truck logistical convoy snaked its way along an Iraqi highway just north of Baghdad International Airport on its way to Logistics Support Area Anaconda. In the lead gun truck rode SFC Michael Segreaves, a squad leader with the 810th Military Police Company charged with protecting the convoy with the help of 18 other MPs.

As the convoy neared a cloverleaf where two highways connect, surrounded by tall buildings, Segreaves could see several plumes of smoke near the roads. When the convoy entered the cloverleaf, Segreaves realized the area was a prime ambush site –and that the smoke was rising from an earlier ambush.

Just as he realized that, the ambush began.

Several improvised explosive devices (IEDs) exploded near the convoy as it turned into the cloverleaf. A single rocket propelled grenade flew toward the convoy, but missed it completely.

“The guy that fired that RPG couldn’t hit anything,” Segreaves remarked.

While the front of the convoy came under attack, the rear element saw what it thought was friendly forces.

“The rear gun radioed me and said that he saw dismounted troops and wanted to check them out,” Segreaves explained.

Segreaves suspected they were not friendly forces and wanted the convoy to keep moving --but the rear element stopped anyway. There was no reply when he tried to call them back on the radio.

“We lost communication with each other,” Segreaves explained.

The lead element of the convoy drove onto the overpass, where they encountered a stranded Stryker vehicle.

The Stryker was part of another convoy from Segreaves’ camp that had been attacked earlier that morning. U.S. forces were in the process of loading it onto a Heavy Equipment and Truck Transport (HETT), but the disabled Stryker was continuing to block traffic.

Segreaves established a security formation around the stranded Stryker, approaching a sergeant in the Stryker to determine how long it would take to load the vehicle onto the HETT. Suddenly, the rooftops erupted with small arms fire. The insurgents launched the main thrust of their ambush, including more RPGs and IEDs.

“This was my very first convoy into Iraq, and it was a toe-to-toe fight,” Segreaves said.

Segreaves wanted to call for close air support but realized he did not have the correct frequencies, so he asked the Stryker sergeant. Segreaves then ran towards the rear of the convoy to reestablish communications with the rear security team -- all while continuing to direct suppressive fire to protect the convoy and recover the Stryker. The rear element soon arrived.

Able to turn more attention to the fight now that he had accounted for the rest of convoy, Segreaves returned to the front of the convoy and continued to fight beside his Soldiers. The ambush had worsened; now insurgents were attacking from the rear, from rooftops and even from below the overpass.

“My guys were dumping a lot of ammo,” Segreaves said. “I’m thinking the whole time, ‘fire discipline, fire discipline,’ because I don’t want to be standing out here with my 9mm.”

Minutes after he asked the Stryker sergeant to call for air support, attack helicopters began circling overhead. The insurgents fled at the sound of rotors, and Segreaves and his Soldiers continued with their mission.

Later, an infantry unit responded to the area and cleared the buildings where the convoy had drawn fire. Segreaves later learned that his earlier fight resulted in nine insurgent casualties. There was no damage to his convoy and no U.S. casualties.

“I didn’t do anything that any other NCO wouldn’t do,” Segreaves shared humbly. He said it almost felt awkward to receive the Bronze Star for Valor.

“Without my squad I would be nothing. I was blessed to have great guys,” Segreaves said.
~
James A. Hayes - - Hometown: Saint Maries, ID - - Awarded: Bronze Star

Army Maj. James A. Hayes was a member of the Multi-National Corps Iraq during Operation Iraqi Freedom. He is described as a great commander – one who took care of his men and took the fight to the enemy.

On the eve of Iraq’s first free elections in January 2005, then a captain, Hayes received the mission to establish one of three polling sites in the northern city of Tal’afar. Along with members of his reconnaissance troop, he received an infantry platoon, anti-tank platoon, and a 45-man Iraqi Commando Company to establish security for not only the polling site, but also the nearby hospital and two traffic control points.

Enemy contact began upon the initial occupation of the area on Jan. 28, and culminated in a 96-hour firefight.

Because of the high demand for troops to secure the various sites, Hayes only had a few men remaining to attack insurgents.

He led mounted and dismounted patrols with members of his troop task force along with one squad from the Iraqi Commando Company.

“I focused the patrols where the most intense enemy fire was originating,” said Hayes as he recalled the incidents.

As a result, several insurgents were captured or killed over the four-day period with no serious injuries to his forces or loss of civilian life.

“The insurgents had posted flyers warning of what would happen to anyone that participated in the election,” explained Hayes.

This caused his troops and him to be targets as they established and secured one of the polling sites. Days leading up to the election, they faced several attacks.

On Election Day, insurgents began to target the individuals attempting to vote. Despite enemy machine gun fire, mortars, Rocket Propelled Grenades (RPGs) and Improvised Explosive Devices (IEDs) attacks against friendly patrols, the Iraqis were determined to participate in the election process.

“One Iraqi civilian was struck in the abdomen by enemy fire on the way to the polling station, but refused to be taken to the nearby hospital until he had cast his vote,” recalled Hayes. Even with unrelenting enemy fire throughout the day, over 2800 Iraqi citizens braved the life threatening conditions to cast their vote.

For his efforts in establishing and securing the polling site under fire, Hayes was recognized with the Bronze Star while serving as C Troop commander in 2nd Squadron, 14th Cavalry in the 1st Stryker Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division.
~~~~~
Bug recommends . . . Kit Lange [http://www.thenextright.com/blog/200]
~~~~~
The latest from Michael Yon, the foremost “milnews” blogger on the web. If you haven’t read Michael’s dispatches, I strongly urge you to do so at once. It’s important that we all know what’s happening in our world.
“Bug”
~
Greetings,

My few words on torture created an uproar. Am in the process of writing more on the topic. Those who propose that the United States should use wholesale torture are clueless about the realities we face, and in fact their words make them out to be no better than our enemies. Many people seem to believe that by using torture we prove we are tough. Some would disagree. Our enemies use torture yet we stack their bodies high.

Meanwhile, my guess is that friendly casualties in Afghanistan during 2009 will likely double what we saw during 2008. I plan to spend about six months there this year, and to go to Iraq, in order to bring back the good, the bad and the ugly, untainted by the politics that surrounds topics such as torture.

A small dispatch awaits. This one is interesting. [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/tactical-success-strategic-defeat.htm]

The reports I'm getting from Iraq are mostly good, except those reports from the North where the savages are clinging on. We are losing good soldiers up there, though Iraq in general has fallen relatively quiet. I'll try to get to Mosul and tell some soldiers' stories. With as much time as I spend in that place, I should buy an apartment.

It's going to be a long year in Afghanistan. Not looking forward to more hearing loss that's bound to occur. You can't always wear earplugs, and you never know when a rifle will start firing next to your head.

Gordon Brown is delivering an outstanding address to our Congress. If you didn't get to see it, you might want to read a transcript.

The words I've written on torture have spurred such an outcry that it seems important to pause and clarify.

Please read: TORTURE: Some Thoughts [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/torture-part-1.htm]

Big media has caught on with the situation in Afghanistan. Unfortunately, now 2009, they have only caught up to 2006. This year will likely be far more brutal than we have ever seen. At the going rate, my guess is that the Coalition will begin to fall apart by about 2011. The Canadians are wobbling and getting a standing count. They'll likely be TKO by 2011. The British are hanging tough.

Godspeed to General Petraeus and our people. I will be there. [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/on-afghanistan.htm]

The debate on torture is starting to simmer and is heading to a boil. The CIA is in the cross hairs and is reported to have destroyed nearly 100 videos of interrogations.

Many torture supporters apparently do not recognize the dark irony. The irony that even the perception that torture occurred is coming back like a razor-sharp boomerang.

Please read and comment. [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/dark-times.htm]

President Obama has some words on War and Rendition. [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/straight-talk.htm]

I'll return to the United States next week and prepare my gear for a long journey back into war. The truth in Afghanistan is quickly becoming as politically muddled as we saw in Iraq. I'll do my best to keep 'em straight.
--
Am heading to Singapore for some research on al Qaeda, then back to the U.S. for a short trip. Writing is 95% homework and fieldwork.

Please see my latest piece in Townhall Magazine.[http://www.michaelyon-online.com/victory-in-iraq-next-stop-afghanistan.htm]

At the current rate, we are unlikely to ever get out of Afghanistan with anything resembling success. After more than 7 years at war there, the Afghan Army is reported to have only a single battalion (far less than a thousand soldiers) who can operate independently. Incredible.

Meanwhile, Iraq is Obama's to lose. Will keeping his misinformed campaign promises result in a new Iraq war?

Please read and comment. [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/the-pathetic-afghan-army-will-obama-fumble-iraq.htm]

Not sure why this has not been widely reported: Kidnapped. [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/david-rhodes-still-missing.htm]

I recently rolled about a thousand miles around Afghanistan without soldiers, but somehow avoided the same fate

Colonel Bill Hix wishes to clarify some points about the progress and capabilities of the Afghan National Army. Most folks know that I have come to value and greatly respect the viewpoints of our combat leaders. It is important to note that Colonel Hix's assessments are more optimistic than are mine.

Please click.[http://www.michaelyon-online.com/afghan-national-army.htm]

Please read this fascinating story. [http://www.michaelyon-online.com/water-torture.htm]

I will return to the United States this week and pack out to the war.
--
Very Respectfully,
Your correspondent,
Michael Yon

Http://www.michaelyon-online.com/index.php
~~~~~
Last week we watched [Ratings are my own]:
Nanny McPhee (2005) [6.0] Starring Emma Thompson ... Colin Firth
The Marrying Kind (1952) [8.6] Starring Judy Holliday ... Aldo Ray
Let's Make it Legal (1951) [8.7] Starring Claudette Colbert ... Macdonald Carey ... Zachary Scott ... Robert Wagner ... Marilyn Monroe
Kings Go Forth (1958) [6] Starring Frank Sinatra ... Tony Curtis ... Natalie Wood
Cash McCall (1960) [7.5] Starring James Garner ... Natalie Wood ... Nina Foch ... Dean Jagger ... E.G. Marshall
Battle Cry (1955) [7.5] Starring Van Heflin ... Aldo Ray ... James Whitmore ... Raymond Massey ... Tab Hunter ... Dorothy Malone ... Anne Francis ... Fess Parker
~~~~~
We’re currently reading; Hostile contact / Gordon Kent.
We’ve just read: Critical mass / Whitley Strieber.
Run for your life : a novel / by James Patterson & Michael Ledwidge.
Stephen Coonts' Deep Black: Arctic gold / Stephen Coonts.
We intend to read; The quickie : a novel / by James Patterson and Michael Ledwidge
We recommend: Year of the Dog: One Year, One Team, One Goal by Kurt Voigt
~~~~~
http://www.shelfari.com
http://www.shelfari.com/bugsbleat/shelf
~~~~~
Photos on the front of this week’s “Bleat” include shots of “Bug” over the last 10 years.
~~~~~
We’ve now got several addresses on the web for "Da Bleat." For the latest issue, go to http://www.bugsbleat.blogspot.com. Last quarter’s issues can be seen at http://www.bugsbleat4q08.blogspot.com.
Our photos are posted at http://www.bugsbleatphotos.blogspot.com.
If you want to see more photos of April’s train wreck in Magnolia, go to http://www.bugsbleattw.blogspot.com/
~~~~~
Feel free to share the "Bleat" with any and all. That's why we publish it.
~~~~~
Dr. Pat Antoon’s Address:
Pat Antoon 06669-010
Federal Prison Camp
P.O. Box 9300
Texarkana, TX 75505
Be sure and keep him in your prayers.
~~~~~
Recipe(s) of the week - - Mexican Pita Pile Ups - - Diabetic Cooking Magazine
Cook Time 5 minutes Difficulty Easy - - Yields 4 servings

Pita bread with diced chicken, vegetables and spices.

Ingredients
4 Bread, pita, whole wheat, small, 4"
1 cup cooked chicken breast, diced
1 tbsp fresh lime juice
1 tsp ground cumin
1/4 cup canned green Chile peppers, mild
1 cup chopped tomato, seeded
1/4 cup fresh cilantro
2 oz canned black olives, drained, sliced (about 15 olives)
1 cup Cheese, cheddar, sharp, reduced fat, finely shredded

Directions
1 Place pita breads on work surface. Top each with 1/4 cup chicken, lime juice, cumin, chilies, tomato, cilantro, olives and cheese.
2 Place each pita in quart-sized resealable plastic food storage bag. Seal and refrigerate until ready to serve.
3 To serve, place pita on microwavable plate. Microwave at HIGH 1 minute or until cheese is melted. Let stand 2 to 3 minutes until crust is slightly firm.

Amount Per Serving
Calories 222.8
Total Carbs 19.2g
Dietary Fiber 3g
Sugars 1.5g
Total Fat 8.5g
Saturated Fat 4g
Unsaturated Fat 4.5g
Potassium 117.5mg
Protein 19.8g
Sodium 445.5mg

Dietary Exchanges - - 1/4 Fat, 1 Meat, 1 Starch, ½ Vegetable, 1 1/4 Very Lean Meat

http://www.dlife.com/diabetes/diabetic-recipes/Mexican-Pita-Pile-Ups/r585.html?id=585&print=true&servingMultiple=4
~~~~~
BreakPoint
Economic Lent
By Chuck Colson
3/13/2009
Idolatry and the Financial Crisis

Yesterday, I told you about a Lenten “carbon fast” proposed by two Anglican bishops. I am, to put it politely, skeptical of the spiritual value of their proposal. Still, I agree with the bishops that the weeks before Good Friday and Easter are the right time to examine our lives, including our attitudes toward money and possessions.

This is especially important during these difficult economic times. Many of our personal and corporate behaviors most associated with the crisis are, in fact, spiritual failures for which the Christian faith has an alternative.

One obvious failure is our levels of indebtedness. As historian Niall Ferguson recently wrote, “Western . . . governments, corporations and households are groaning under unprecedented debt burdens. Average household debt has reached 141% of disposable income in the United States and 177% in Britain.”

Our financial institutions, he continues, are in far worse shape. “Some of the best-known names in American and European finance have liabilities 40, 60 or even 100 times the amount of their capital.”

While the Scriptures have something to say about the perils of indebtedness, they have much more to say about the human failings that prompted the “unprecedented debt burdens”—like greed and covetousness.

We are all familiar with stories about people who purchased homes they knew or should have known they couldn’t afford. It is not only home buyers who succumbed to covetousness. As the story of the financial crisis unfolds, we are learning more about how the risk-taking that led to the crisis was tied to compensation.

As Gretchen Morgenson of the New York Times puts it, “Many banks took on far too much risk in the interests of trying to juice their profits,” which, in turn, led to higher executive pay. The fact that the money being risked wasn’t theirs made the “juicing” even easier.

We are now living with the wreckage caused by all this covetousness.

Ultimately, as Paul told the Colossians, covetousness is idolatry—it is worshiping and placing our trust in something man-made rather than the One who made man. It is seeking fulfillment and even meaning in something other than God.

Of course, whatever you trust and believe gives you meaning and purpose, and that is going to take precedence in your life. That’s why scarcely a chapter in the gospels goes by without our Lord warning against the dangers of wealth.

These warnings are so common and our love of possessions so great that many of us have tuned them out or interpreted the Scriptures in a way that turn Jesus’ obvious meaning on its head. We debate camels and eyes of needles so as to miss the point: Wealth and possessions can be snares to our souls.

Like all idols, what Jesus called “mammon” will fail its worshipers. The good times will stop rolling, leaving us with moths and rust—and that’s after thieves in three-piece suits have cleared the place out.

Sound familiar? Thankfully, Jesus also had a lot to say about lost sheep and prodigal sons. Which, if we truly examine our lives this Easter, pretty much includes all of us.
~
Select Comfort
By Chuck Colson
3/20/2009
Religion and the Dying

According to a new study, terminally ill cancer patients who “drew comfort from religion” don’t want to die if they don’t have to. Well, no surprise. But, says the Times, they’re less eager to die than people who don’t draw “comfort from religion.”

Well that’s interesting, perhaps, but there is a more important as well as more troubling aspect to the story that’s going unnoticed.

The study appears in the most recent issue of the Journal of the American Medical Association. Researchers from the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute in Boston used questionnaires and interviews “to assess the level of reliance on religious faith for comfort” of 345 terminally ill patients.

The “vast majority” of the patients—some 90 percent of those who were religious and 97 percent of those who were not—did not want “heroic measures,” such as mechanical ventilators or CPR, to be used in their cases.

Based on that seven percentage-point difference the New York Times proclaimed “Religious Belief Linked to Desire for Aggressive Treatment in Terminal Patients.” Please.

Do a little more math and you will realize that sweeping generalizations like “far more likely to seek aggressive, life-prolonging care” are based on the responses of approximately 25 people.

The researchers acknowledged that the study didn’t explore why this small handful of religious patients sought “extensive end-of-life care.” That didn’t stop them from speculating anyway. One of the study’s authors disabused Times’ readers of the idea that “spiritual patients are more likely to say their lives are in God’s hands.”

Instead, she told the Times, “to religious people, life is sacred and sanctified . . . they feel it’s their duty and obligation to stay alive as long as possible.”

That has it backwards. If 90 percent of the religious people in the study refused heroic measures, then it’s more accurate to say that they don’t feel such an obligation—possibly because they believe that their lives are in God’s hands.

If all that was going on here was yet another mis-characterization of the faithful, it wouldn’t matter. But the Times let its readers know why they should care: cost.

The Times noted that Medicare “spends about one-third of its budget on people who are in the last year of life, and much of that on patients at the very end of life.” The study noted that the religious patients “were less likely to have completed advance medical directives, such as a living will or do-not-resuscitate order.”

Anything, including religious belief, that might motivate people to seek “aggressive treatment” toward the end of life, costs money. Ominously, Wesley J. Smith has documented the “growing utilitarian emphasis in medicine,” in which saving money increasingly takes precedence over “doing right by suffering patients.”

Little wonder, then, that what amounts to a statistical blip becomes the stuff of headlines. Religion can be a problem if it makes people want to stay alive longer. As we nationalize healthcare, as Smith warns, the sick and infirm will soon be told they should do the patriotic thing: go quietly.

For Further Reading and Information

Read the article by the New York Times, "Religious Belief Linked to Desire for Aggressive Treatment in Terminal Patients."

More information on Wesley J. Smith and the futile care theory.

R. Albert Mohler, Jr., "Do Not Cast Me Off in the Time of Old Age, Part One", (Part Two), The Christian Post, 7 March 2009.

A Demented Idea, BreakPoint Commentary, 23 October 2008.

The March of Death, BreakPoint Commentary, 13 January 2009.

Niall Ferguson, “Keynes Can't Help Us Now,” Los Angeles Times, 6 February 2009.

David Folkenflik, “Where Were The Media As Wall Street Imploded?,” NPR Media Circus, 8 March 2009.

James Saft, “The Illogic of Financial-Services Compensation,” Reuters, 6 May 2008.

Zoe Sandvig, “A Primer for Lent,” The Point, 25 February 2009.

“A Fast that Counts,” The Point Radio, 25 February 2009.

“Coal in the Easter Basket: Giving up Carbon for Lent,” BreakPoint Commentary, 12 March 2009.

© 2009 Prison Fellowship - - http://www.breakpoint.org/
~
Residents of Columbia CountyArkansas are represented in Congress by:
Senator Blanche Lambert Lincoln (D- AR)
Phone 202-224-4843
FAX 202-228-1371
http://lincoln.senate.gov/contact/email.cfm
~
Senator Mark Pryor (D- AR)
Phone 202-224-2353
FAX 202-228-0908
http://pryor.senate.gov/contact/
~
Representative Michael A. Ross (D - 04)
Phone 202-225-3772
FAX 202-225-1314
http://ross.house.gov/?sectionid=77§iontree=7677
Other states congresspersons can be found at: [http://www.visi.com/juan/congress/]
~~~~~
Words of the Week:
martial: pertaining to war
bilk: defraud, cheat, or swindle.
equine: of horses and hoofed animals.
incisive: penetrating, sharp, cutting.
pedestrian: walker; also, unimaginative.
ululate: to howl; to wail.
tetchy: peevish; testy; irritable.
inanition: exhaustion from lack of nourishment; also, emptiness.
esoteric: intended or understood by chosen few.
scintilla: a tiny amount; a spark.
cormorant: a gluttonous or greedy person.
libation: the act of pouring a liquid as a sacrifice; also, a beverage.
elucidate: to make clear or manifest.
florid: flushed with red; also, excessively ornate.
diatribe: a bitter verbal attack.
from http://dictionary.reference.com/wordoftheday/
~~~~~
"Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action." - Benjamin Disraeli

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on." - Robert Frost

"If Columbus had an advisory committee he would probably still be at the dock." - Arthur Goldberg

"The most important scientific revolutions all include, as their only common feature, the dethronement of human arrogance from one pedestal after another of previous convictions about our centrality in the cosmos." - Stephen Jay Gould

"Not being able to govern events, I govern myself." - Michel de Montaigne

"Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop." - Ovid

"I think that we may safely trust a good deal more than we do. We may waive just so much care of ourselves as we honestly bestow elsewhere. Nature is as well adapted to our weakness as to our strength." - Henry David Thoreau

The old believe everything; the middle-aged suspect everything; the young know everything. - Oscar Wilde

You can't live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you. - John Wooden

Let your capital be simplicity and contentment. - Henry David Thoreau

All animals are equal but some animals are more equal than others. - George Orwell

We had the experience but missed the meaning. - T. S. Eliot

The basis of our governments being the opinion of the people, the very first object should be to keep that right; and were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government, I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter. - Thomas Jefferson

Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes. - Oscar Wilde
~~~~~
BREAKING CHRISTIAN NEWS
http://breakingchristiannews.com/

Believers Calm Doing Mental Tasks Compared to Non-Believers
Teresa Neumann (March 11, 2009)
"The greater the religious zeal, the less activity in this region of the brain for the tests but even those who were not particularly religious but believed in God did better than non-believers."
(Toronto, Canada)—The Telegraph U.K. reports that tests by Michael Inzlicht and fellow researchers at the University of Toronto in Canada have found those who admit they believe in God were less likely to suffer anxiety and stress when asked to perform various mental tasks and, as a result, performed better.
The stronger their belief, notes the report, the calmer they remained even when they made a mistake. . .

310 2nd Ave SE
Albany, Oregon 97321
541-928-2642
E-mail editor@breakingchristiannews.com
US Orders: 1-866-358-7426
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GCF: Nothin'

My wife said, "Whatcha doin' today?"

I said "Nothin'."

She said, "You did that yesterday."

I said, "I wasn't finished."
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Dormitory

At a girl's college dormitory, dates were permitted only on Saturday night. One young man showed up on a Tuesday evening, explaining to an older woman in the lobby of the dorm that it was imperative he see a certain young lady immediately.

"I want to surprise her. You see, I'm her brother."

"Oh, she'll be surprised all right," said the woman. "But think of how surprised I am! I'm her mother!"
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Diamond Ring

An acquaintance of mine, whose daughter was about to be married, decided to give her a diamond ring that had been in the family for several generations. The stone had never been appraised, so the father asked a gemologist friend if she would take a look at it. She agreed, but said that, instead of a fee she would accept lunch at one of Houston's finer restaurants.

A few days later, as he and the gem expert sat sipping a glass of Chablis, he showed her the ring. She took out her jeweler's loupe, examined the diamond carefully and handed it back.

"Wow," said a diner who had been watching from the next table. "These Texas women are tough!"
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Diminutive

Frustrated at my attempts to find something suitable for my diminutive daughter to wear that didn't look like something for a child, I approached a rather harried-looking saleswoman.

"What do you have for a petite woman about five feet tall, around 95 to 100 pounds?" I asked.

The short, pleasantly plump clerk looked at me with a rueful smile. "Nothing but contempt," she said.
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Chapter 11

A job notice posted at the University placement office advertised for someone to set up a bookkeeping system for a local dinner theater that was filing for bankruptcy.

When an eager first-year accounting student inquired, the interviewer told him that the company needed an advanced student capable of handling Chapter 11 proceedings.

"I'm sure I could do it," the student proclaimed confidently. "My class is already up to chapter fourteen."
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Penny Scales

A husband stepped on one of those penny scales that tell you your fortune and weight and dropped in a coin.

"Listen to this," he said to his wife, showing her a small, white card. "It says I'm energetic, bright, resourceful and a great person."

"Yeah," his wife nodded, "and it has your weight wrong, too."
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Officer's First Patrol

A rookie police officer was assigned to ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came over the car's radio telling them to disperse some people who were loitering.

The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner. The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let's get off the corner."

No one moved, so he barked again, "Let's get off the corner!" Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled glances in his direction. Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?"

"Pretty good," replied the veteran, "especially since this was a bus stop."
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Kittens

A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a new litter of kittens. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother, "There were two boy kittens and two girl kittens."

"How did you know that?" his mother asked.

"Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," he replied. "I think it's printed on the bottom."
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Party Crashers

A party was being held and the hostess was getting worried because there were too many people and not enough refreshments.

She was sure that not all of these people had been invited but didn't know how to tell which ones were the crashers. Then her husband got an idea.

He turned to the crowd of guests and said "Will everyone from the bride's side of the family stand up please?" About twenty people stood.

Then he asked " Will everyone from the groom's side of the family stand up as well?" About twenty five people stood up.

Then he smiled and said, 'Will everyone who stood, please leave. This is a BIRTHDAY PARTY."
_ ____________________________ _
GCF: Jump School

After enlisting in the 82nd Airborne Division, I eagerly asked my Recruiter what I could expect from jump school.

"Well," he said, "its three weeks long."

"What else," I asked.

"The first week they separate the men from the boys," he said.

"The second week, they separate the men from the fools."

"And the third week?" I asked.

"The third week, the fools jump."
_ ____________________________ _
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / For every action, there is an \ /
\ _/ equal and opposite criticism. \_ /
/ / \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / What do you do when \ \_/ ////
\ / you see an endangered \ /
\ _/ animal that is eating an \_ /
/ / endangered plant? \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / When someone annoys you, it \ \_/ ////
\ / takes 42 muscles to frown, but \ /
\ _/ it only takes 4 muscles to extend \_ /
/ / your arm and whack them in the head. \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Junk: stuff we throw away. \ /
\ _/ \_ /
/ / Stuff: junk we keep. \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / If a parsley farmer is sued, \ /
\ _/ can they garnish his wages? \_ /
/ / \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Someday, we may discover how \ /
\ _/ to make a magnet that \_ /
/ / can point in all directions. \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / If a book about failures \ /
\ _/ doesn't sell, \_ /
/ / is it a success? \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Why do they lock gas station \ /
\ _/ bathrooms? Are they afraid \_ /
/ / someone may clean them? \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / Teamwork is essential. \ /
\ _/ It allows you to blame \_ /
/ / someone else. \ \
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_|\\\\ \_/ / \ \_/ ////
\ / The two most common elements \ /
\ _/ in the universe are \_ /
/ / hydrogen and stupidity. \ \
_ ____________________________ _
/ )| Thomas S. Ellsworth |( \
/ / | tellswor@slonet.org | \ \
_( (_ | http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor | _) )_
(((\ \>|_/ )___________________( \_| ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><> ><>
David Childs send us his story “Fight to the death with a Possum. (The Big Ole Possum Story)” but asked us not to publish it. So I’ll tell you the other Possum story I know.

Jim McWilliams, Darrel Welch and a couple of other guys (they aren’t important to the story) went hunting one night. On the way back to town, Jim (who was driving) saw a Possum “sulled” in the road.
Now, get the whole picture; Jim was driving his micro mini Chevette and Darrel was literally “crammed into the back seat behind the driver. It was about 2 am.
Jim slowed down, opened the drivers door and scooped the possum into the back floorboard. Then he drove on down the highway. Again, get the picture; it’s a pitch black night with only the feeble dash lights illuminating the car interior. Darrel is folded up in the back seat with his knees almost touching the car ceiling. There’s an animal who is no longer “sulled” on the floor. She’s hissing and making other threatening noises.
Suddenly the car begins to rock and shake as Darryl tries to get out of the little two door vehicle while it’s moving down the road.
When Jim finally got the vehicle stopped, Darryl had managed to get into the front passenger seat with the other hunter and had the door open, preparing to jump. Once the vehicle stopped, all aboard did exit, including the Possum.
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Now thats a good story James. Kind of brings to mind .......With friends like this, who needs enemies. I have friends that do the same stuff, but I don't. lol

We were sitting around the deer camp close to the fire. Its dark and one of the members walks thru between us and the fire. Right after he passes there is this 5 and half foot rattler following him. In the commotion of hunter survival ....chairs, firewood, drinks, paper plates, food and bodies scatter in all directions. No one is close to a rifle or big long stick. So for about a minute the camp belongs to this monster snake. Then it is revealed that said snake is dead (sorry Martha) and the guy had tied it to his shoe with a piece of fishing line. I love friends like that.

Thanks to David Childs
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I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Richard , the 11 year old next door whose bedroom looks like Mission Control, and asked him to come over.
Richard clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.
As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong?
He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'
I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'
Richard grinned. 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?''
No,' I replied.
'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'
So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T
I used to like the little kid.

Thanks to David Childs
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From the Northwest Florida Daily News comes this story of a Crestview couple who drove their car to Wal-Mart, only to have their car break down in the parking lot. The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car in the lot.
The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection, she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones.
Unable to stand the embarrassment, she dutifully stepped forward, quickly put her hand UP his shorts, and tucked everything back into place. She took a deep breath and stood up boldly to face the crowd. She looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband, who had been standing idly by. The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his forehead.

Thanks to David Childs
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Terrorist cells in churches

Latest news reports are that five terrorist cell groups have been operating in many of our churches. They have been identified as: Bin Sleepin Bin Arguin Bin Fightin Bin Complainin and Bin Missin.
Their leader Osama Bin Lucifer trained these groups to destroy the Body of Christ. The plan is to come into the church disguised as Christians and to work within the church--to discourage disrupt and destroy.
However there have also been reports of a sixth group. A tiny cell known by the name Bin Prayin is actually the only effective counter terrorism force in the church. Unlike other terrorist cells the Bin Prayin team does not blend in with whoever and whatever comes along.
Bin Prayin does whatever is needed to uplift and encourage the Body of Christ. We have noticed that the Bin Prayin cell group has different characteristics than the others. They have Bin Watchin Bin Waitin Bin Fastin and Bin Longin for their Master Jesus Christ to return.
Which cell group do you belong to?

"For by grace you have been saved through faith and that not of yourselves it is the gift of God" Ephesians 1:8 (NKJ)

Thanks to NORMA KAY AND MIKE ROWE
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From my Senior Class Face Book Group: “Things that irritate me and what I do about them.”

Lazy people that shop with shopping buggys and don't return them.

It takes all of about 2 seconds, count 'em two seconds, to actually roll your buggy all the way into the buggy corral. When just 10 shoppers don't do this then all the buggys are left out of the corral and around it in parking spaces, etc. etc...

So, for all you lazy folks, don't let me catch you not pushing your buggy up into the corral and into the buggy that was there before you..

Thank you for your support with this and teach your children. The more saved taking care of these buggys could be passed along to us in the form of lower prices.
~
Rosemary,

The buggy thing "pulls my chain also." I make it a habit to pick up a buggy in the parking lot (there are plenty spread around) and use it. That's one less to ding someones car.

A while back I headed to the parking lot with my purchase (carrying my bags to make it one less buggy the store had to pick up out of the buggy corral) when I saw a woman pushing a buggy with one, small bag in it. About the size bag to hold a lipstick.
She was parked next to me and we both got there at the same time. After loading my purchases in the truck, I sat there a moment to update my check book before backing out.
When I started backing out, “BANG” I hit something. I stopped an got out to see what it was. This Idiot had unloaded her small bag and left the cart behind my truck before she drove off.
“URGE TO KILL!”
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What do you call a fly without wings?

A walker -

Thanks to Martha Chapman
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Judas Asparagus - - A child was asked to write a book report on the entire Bible. This is amazing and brought tears of laughter to my eyes. I wonder how often we take for granted that children understand what we are teaching???

The Children's Bible in a Nutshell

In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, 'The Lord thy God is one, but I think He must be a lot older than that.
Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!' and someone did.
Then God made the world.
He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet.
Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden.
Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars.
Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel.
Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.
One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.
After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.
Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.

God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments.
These include: don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor's stuff.
Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother.
One of Moses' best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.
After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn't sound very wise to me.
After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets.
One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore. There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don't have to worry about them.
After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of The New. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying to me, 'Close the door! Were you born in a barn?' It would be nice to say, 'As a matter of fact, I was.')
During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Democrats.
Jesus also had twelve opossums.
The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.
Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount.
But the Democrats and all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.
Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again.
He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.

Thanks to Waneta
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Grandparents: Some old stories and some new ones!

1. She was in the bathroom, putting on her makeup, under the watchful eyes of her young granddaughter, as she'd done many times before. After she applied her lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But Gramma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!" I will probably neverput lipstick on again without thinking about kissing the toilet paper good-bye...
2. My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him, 62. My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"
3. After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"
4. A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
5. My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo and I said, "No, how are we alike?'' "You're both old," he replied.
6. A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."
7. I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued. At last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these, yourself!"
8. When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use Grandpa. Now the mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights."
9. When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised, "mine says I'm 4 to 6."
10. A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting," she said, "how do you make babies?" "It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."
11. Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant." The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked. "Sure," said the young boy confidently. 'It means carrying a child."
12.. A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to their home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one child. "No," said another. "He's just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a close."They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrants."
13. A 6-year-old was asked where his grandma lived. "Oh," he said, "she lives at the airport, and when we want her, we just go get her. Then, when we're done having her visit, we take her back to the airport."
14. Grandpa is the smartest man on earth! He teaches me good things, but I don't get to see him enough to get as smart as him!

Thanks to Waneta
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You might be a teacher if you believe the playground should be equipped with a Ritalin salt lick.
You might be a teacher if you want to slap the next person who says, "Must be nice to work from 8 to 3:30 and have summers off."
You might be a teacher if it is difficult to name your own child because there's no name you can come up with that doesn't bring high blood pressure as it is uttered.
You might be a teacher if you can tell it's a full moon or if it's going to rain, snow, hail... anything!!! without ever looking outside.
You might be a teacher if you believe, "shallow gene pool" should have its own box on a report card.
You might be a teacher if you believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says, "Boy, the kids sure are mellow today."
You might be a teacher if when out in public, you feel the urge to snap your fingers at children you do not know and correct their behavior.
You might be a teacher if you have no social life between August and June.
You might be a teacher if you think people should have a government permit before being allowed to reproduce.
You might be a teacher if you wonder how some parents MANAGED to reproduce.
You might be a teacher if you laugh uncontrollably when people refer to the staff room as the "lounge".
You might be a teacher if you encourage an obnoxious parent to check into charter schools or home schooling and are willing to donate the U- HAUL boxes should they decide to move out of district.
You might be a teacher if you think caffeine should be available in intravenous form.
You might be a teacher if you can't imagine how the ACLU could think that covering your students' chairs with Velcro and then requiring uniforms made out of the corresponding Velcro could ever be misunderstood by the public.
You might be a teacher if meeting a child's parent instantly answers this question, "Why is this kid like this?"
You might be a teacher if you would choose a mammogram over a parent conference.
You might be a teacher if you think someone should invent antibacterial pencils and crayons... and desks and chairs for that matter!
You might be a teacher if the words "I have a college debt for this?" has ever come out of your mouth.
You might be a teacher if you know how many days, minutes, and seconds are left in the school year! (Jeff Foxworthy)

Thanks to Waneta
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A collector of rare books ran into an acquaintance who told him he had just thrown away an old Bible that he found in a dusty, old box. He happened to mention that Guten-somebody-or-other had printed it.
"Not Gutenberg?" Gasped the collector.
"Yes, that was it!""You idiot! You've thrown away one of the first books ever printed.
A copy recently sold at an auction for half a million dollars!"
"Oh, I don't think this book would have been worth anything close to that much," replied the man. "It was scribbled all over in the margins by some guy named Martin Luther."

Thanks to Waneta
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Miss Sally Edwards is a highly esteemed third grade teacher at Clark County Elementary School.
In an effort to prepare her students for the all-important TAKS test, she compiled an exam consisting of 20 que stions , which she administered to her class last Tuesday. The exam purposely covered a broad array of topics.
I call your attention to question # 11, which simply read: LIST, IN ANY ORDER, THE FOUR SEASONS: 1. ________ 2. ________ 3.________ 4. ________
Now, could you possibly imagine that 67% of the students gave the following answer? 1. DOVE SEASON 2. DEER SEASON 3. DUCK SEASON 4. TURKEY SEASON

GOD BLESS MISSISSIPPI

Thanks to Gary Foreman
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"It's only a joke!"

HOW TO START EACH DAY WITH A POSITIVE OUTLOOK
1. Open a new file in your computer.
2. Name it 'Barack Obama'.
3. Send it to the Recycle Bin.
4. Empty the Recycle Bin.
5. Your PC will ask you: 'Do you really want to get rid of 'Barack Obama?'
6. Firmly Click 'Yes.'
7. Feel better?
GOOD! - Tomorrow we'll do Nancy Pelosi

Thanks to Gary Foreman
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Born a Baptist

Bubba, a Baptist, moved to Baton Rouge, into a largely Catholic neighborhood. Each Friday night after work, Bubba would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a venison steak. But, all of Bubba's neighbors were Catholic....And since it was Lent , they were forbidden from eating meat on Friday .
The delicious aroma from the grilled venison steaks was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their priest.
The Priest came to visit Bubba, and suggested that he become a Catholic. After several classes and much study, Bubba attended Mass.....and as the priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said, 'You were born a Baptist, and raised a Baptist, but now you are a Catholic.'
Bubba's neighbors were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived, and the wonderful aroma of grilled venison filled the neighborhood. The Priest was called immediately by the neighbors, and, as he rushed into Bubba's yard, clutching a rosary and prepared to scold him, he stopped and watched in amazement.
There stood Bubba, clutching a small bottle of holy water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat and chanted: 'You wuz born a deer, you wuz raised a deer, but now you is a catfish.'

Thanks to Waneta
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The Villages

A little old lady is sitting on a park bench in "The Villages," a Florida adult community.
A man walks over and sits down on the other end of the bench.
After a few moments, the woman asks, "Are you a stranger here?"
He replies, "I lived here years ago."
"So, where were you all these years?"
"In prison," he says.
"Why did they put you in prison?"
He looks at her and very quietly says, "I killed my wife."
"Oh!" says the woman. "So you're single?"
Received from Michael B. Wright (Tampa).

(-:][:-)

The Older Crowd

Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me! I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of algebra.
You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.
Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper. It's worse when you forget to pull it down.
Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf.

Received from Natasha Jones.

(-:][:-)

At the Zoo

A father and his small son were standing in front of the tiger's cage at the zoo. The father was explaining how ferocious and strong tigers are, and junior was taking it all in with a serious expression.
"Dad," the boy said finally, "if the tiger got out of his cage and ate you up ... "
"Yes, son?" the father said expectantly.
" ... what bus should I take home?" the boy finished.

Received from Thomas Ellsworth.

(-:][:-)

The Bar vs. The Baptists

In a small midwestern conservative town, a business owner began to construct a building for a new bar. The local Baptist church started a campaign to block the bar from opening with petitions and prayers.
Work progressed, however, right up until the week before opening, when a lightning strike hit the bar and it burned to the ground.
The church folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, until the bar owner sued the church on the grounds that the church was ultimately responsible for the demise of his building, either through direct or indirect actions or means.
In its reply to the court, the church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise.
As the case made its way into court, the judge looked over the paperwork at the hearing and commented, "I don't know how I'm going to decide this, but as it appears from the paperwork, we have a bar owner who believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that doesn't!"

Received from Dean.

(-:][:-)

Three Cajuns, One Ticket

One morning, three Cajuns and three Yankees were in a ticket line at a train station. The three Northerners each bought a ticket and watched as the three Cajuns bought just one ticket.
"How are the three of you going to travel on only one ticket?" asked one of the Yankees.
"Watch and learn," answered one of the boys from Louisiana.
All six boarded the train where the three Yankees sat down, but the three Cajuns crammed into a restroom together and closed the door.
Shortly after the train departed, the conductor came around to collect tickets.
He knocked on the restroom door and said, "Ticket, please." The door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand. The conductor took it and moved on.
The Yankees saw this happen and agreed it was quite a clever idea. Indeed, it was so clever that they decided to do the same thing on the return trip and save some money.
That afternoon when they got back to the station, they bought a single ticket for the return trip and watched while to their astonishment, the three Cajuns didn't buy even one ticket.
"How are you going to travel without a ticket?" asked one of the perplexed Yankees.
"Watch and learn," answered the three Cajun boys in unison.
When they boarded the train, the three Northerners crammed themselves into one restroom and the three Cajuns crammed into another one just down the way. Shortly after the train began to move, one of the Cajuns left their restroom and walked over to the one in which the Yankees were hiding.
The Cajun knocked on the door and said, "Ticket, please."
There's just no way on God's green earth to explain how the Yankees won that war.

Received from DL Wyche.

(-:][:-)

Sunday Complaints

After church one Sunday morning, a mother commented, "The choir was awful this morning."
The father commented, "The sermon was too long."
Their seven-year-old daughter added, "You've got to admit it was a pretty good show for a dollar."

Received from Thomas Ellsworth.

(-:][:-)

Perley Moore Buys a Truck

This is from America's Test Kitchen.

There was a farmer, Perley Moore, who had recently bought a truck and found that the "basic price" was only the beginning. Once the salesman had added on all the extras -- towing package, toolbox, fifth-wheel attachment, etc. -- the price was quite a bit higher. Well, by a strange turn of fate, that same salesman stopped by Perley's farm one day to buy a cow. The dealer examined the herd, picked out a likely specimen, and asked about the price.
"That's a hundred-dollar cow," Moore replied directly.
"That's fair enough," said the salesman. "I'll take her."
"Well, now, that's the basic price," Moore added, getting out pencil and paper. "There are one or two extras, of course." He made a few notes and handed the paper to the dealer. Here is the final invoice:

Basic cow: $100
Two-tone exterior: $45
Storage compartment and dispensing device: $60
Four spigots @ $10 each: $40
Genuine cowhide upholstery: $75
Dual horns @ $7.50 each: $15
Automatic fly-swatter: $35

Total: $370

Received from James Smith.

(-:][:-)

A New Throne

A tribal chieftain commissioned the construction of a new throne. When it was finished, he was not satisfied, so he commissioned another one. Meanwhile, he put the rejected throne in the attic of his grass hut.
When the second throne arrived, he still was not satisfied. He put it in the attic and commissioned another more elaborate one.
Well, the third one arrived, and wouldn't you know it, he still was not happy, so up to the attic it went.
Finally he sent for the best craftsmen from the surrounding villages, gave them explicit instructions, and told them to take as long as they needed. After six long months, the craftsmen finally appeared with the masterpiece. The chief was elated, and he ordered it placed right in the center of his hut. As he got himself comfortable on the beautiful throne, a big smile came across his face. The craftsmen were so relieved they had succeeded that everyone broke out in song and dance, creating quite a commotion. Then, in the middle of the jubilation, some of the structural supports were jostled, the ceiling collapsed, and the three rejected thrones in the attic came tumbling down on the chief, killing him instantly.
So, the moral of the story is simple: people who live in grass houses shouldn't stow thrones!

Received from Bob Rohland.

(-:][:-)

Wild Cuisine

I love the outdoors, and because of my passion for hunting and fishing, my family eats a considerable amount of wild game.
We eat so much wild game, in fact, that one evening as I set a platter of broiled venison steaks on the dinner table, my ten-year-old daughter looked up and said:
"Boy, it sure would be nice if pizzas lived in the woods."

Received from Thomas Ellsworth.

(-:][:-)

Apprehension

After booking my 80-year-old grandmother on a flight from Florida to Nevada, I called the airline to go over her special needs. The representative listened patiently as I requested a wheelchair and an attendant for my mother because of her arthritis and impaired vision to the point of near blindness.
My apprehension lightened a bit when the woman assured me that everything would be taken care of. I thanked her profusely.
"Oh, you're welcome," she replied. I was about to hang up when she cheerfully asked, "And will your grandmother need a rental car?"

(-:][:-)

-=+=-
Rate this funny at http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
Brought to you by GCFL.net: The Good, Clean Funnies List A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a) Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA
To print or email this funny to others, go to http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20060113
The latest GCFL funny can always be found on the web at http://www.gcfl.net/latest.php
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Madeleine Begun Kane Latest Columns - - http://www.madkane.com/parental.html - - PARENTAL PROPOSAL - - The "help wanted" pages are filled with job descriptions that defy comprehension. This probably explains why so many parents can't quite figure out what it is their children do for a living. And it can lead to parental queries like this one from my mother-in-law to my husband Mark:

"Tell me exactly what your job is. Go slowly. I have to write it down."

Mark hadn't switched employers or secured a promotion; he's been doing essentially the same work for ten years. So why the sudden curiosity? Because his parents recently attended a wedding packed with inquisitive relatives. Relatives who appeared to be more interested in Mark's career than they were in the bride and groom.

"Jeff/Harry/Beth is doing great. He/she's a CPA/GYN/PHD," they reportedly said. "So how's Mark? What did you say he does?"

"Something with computers," my mother-in-law answered at first. "And banking, I think."

"That's sounds nice," they responded, "but what exactly does he do?"

"Well I'm not sure, but I know it's very important. So doesn't Sheila make a lovely bride?"

"How could you not know what your own son does for a living?" they prodded, refusing to be distracted by something as inconsequential as the bride's appearance. "What is he -- some kind of spy?"

"Everyone thinks you're with the CIA," Mark's mother complained the moment she came home. "They kept me so busy with their questions, I almost missed dessert. The only way I got to the ruggelah, was to promise to write and explain precisely what you do. So what do you do?"

For the next hour I listened as Mark tried to describe his job, and his mother grew more and more confused. Do other people have this problem, I wondered. So I decided to ask some friends.

"I just tell my folks I work with numbers," an econometrics expert told me. "It doesn't really satisfy them, but it's the best I can do."

"All my parents know is I work with lab rats," said a scientist friend whose job I can't begin to describe.

"I do junk bond work," replied a securities attorney. "How would you like to explain that to your parents?"

The solution to this job generation gap came to me as I listened to the tenth description of an indescribable job. From now on, at least once a year, we should take our parents to work with us. After all, there's already an annual Take Our Daughters To Work Day and a strong move afoot to include sons. But, shockingly, nobody has protested the exclusion of parents. Such blatant discrimination goes to the very essence of parenting -- parents' inalienable right to brag about their kids.

Imagine the educational benefit of parents sitting with their children at the conference table/laboratory/computer room. Witnessing their daughters' demos and their sons' presentations. Watching their offspring interact with bosses, clients, co-workers (both enemies and friends). Gazing as their progeny dodge phone calls, pound keyboards, glare at computer screens, and curse the invention of the fax machine.

There are risks, of course. Dad may cross-examine the boss about health insurance and the company's retirement plan. Mom may whip out a tape measure and compare office footage on her hands and knees. Both will conclude you're smarter than your boss and make sure to let him know it. And you can be sure that one of them will demand to know when you're getting a promotion.

But despite the risks, we owe it to our parents to expose them to our work environments. Besides, a discreetly whispered warning is usually all it takes to get parents to behave. The warning? "If you get me fired, I'll move back home."

Mark is very excited by my idea and plans to try it at his firm next month. What does Mark do? Something with computers. And banking, I think.

© Madeleine Begun Kane. All Rights Reserved.
1st Published Bridge News
http://www.madkane.com/
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Christian One Liners

Don't let your worries get the best of you; Remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
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It is easier to preach ten sermons Than it is to live one.
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The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, But mosquitoes come close.
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When you get to your wit's end, You'll find God lives there.
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People are funny; they want the front of the bus, Middle of the road, And back of the church.
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Opportunity may knock once, But temptation bangs on the front door forever.
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If a church wants a better minister, It only needs to pray for the one it has.
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We're called to be witnesses, not lawyers or Judges.
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God Himself doesn't propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?
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Some minds are like concrete Thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
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Peace starts with a smile.
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Be ye fishers of men. You catch 'em - He'll clean 'em.
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Stop, Drop, and Roll won't work in Hell.
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Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
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Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
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Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
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Forbidden fruits create many jams.
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God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
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God grades on the cross, not the curve.
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God loves everyone, But probably prefers 'fruits of the spirit' over 'religious nuts!'
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God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
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He who angers you, controls you!
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If God is your Co-pilot, swap seats!
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Prayer: Don't give God instructions, just report for duty!
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The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
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The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
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We don't change the message, The message changes us.
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You can tell how big a person is By what it takes to discourage him...
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The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.
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There is no greater treasure than a good friend!
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass.. It's about learning to dance in the rain

Thanks to Waneta
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The Importance of Walking

Walking can add minutes to your life. This enables you at 85 years old To spend an additional 5 months in a nursing Home at $7000 per month.
My grandpa started walking Five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we don't know where he is.
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
The only reason I would take up walking is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
I have to walk early in the morning, before my brain figures out what I'm doing.
I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to go there.
Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
I do have flabby thighs, But fortunately my stomach covers them.
The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say, 'Well, she looks good doesn't she.'
If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.< /P>
I know I got a lot of exercise the last few years, just getting over the hill.
We all get heavier as we get older, because there's a lot more information in our heads. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

AND

Every time I start thinking too much about how I look, I just find a Happy Hour and by the time I leave, I look just fine.

Thanks to Waneta
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A Birth Certificate shows that we were born
A Death certificate shows that we died
Pictures show that we lived!

I Believe... Just because two people argue, It doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, It doesn't mean they do love each other.
I Believe... We don't have to change friends if We understand that friends change.
I Believe.. No matter how good a friend is, They're going to hurt you every once in a while and You must forgive them for that.
I Believe... True friendship continues to grow, even over The longest distance....The same goes for TRUE Love.
I Believe.. You can do something in an instant That will give you heartache for life.
I Believe... That it's taking me a long, long time, To become the person I want to be...but I am constantly striving to improve my character.
I Believe... You should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
I Believe... You can keep going long after you think you can't.
I Believe... We are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I Believe .... Either you control your attitude, or it will control you.
I Believe.... Money is a LOUSY way of keeping score in life.
I Believe... My best friend and I can do anything, Or we can do nothing and still have the BEST TIME.
I Believe... Sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, Will actually be the ones to help you get back up.
I Believe... Maturity has way more to do with what types of experiences you've had, And what you've learned from them (hopefully you've learned something) and A lot less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
I Believe.. It isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes, you have to learn to FORGIVE YOURSELF....
I Believe.... No matter how bad your heart is broken, The world doesn't stop for your grief.
I Believe.... Our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, But ultimately, WE are responsible for who we become.
I believe... Two people can look at the SAME thing, And see something totally different.
I Believe ... Your life can be changed in a matter of hours.... by people who don't even know you.
I Believe... Even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to HELP.
I Believe... Credentials on the wall do NOT make you a decent human being.
I Believe... 'The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; They just make the most of everything.'

Thanks to Waneta
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The Pump Handle. A water cooler for the public health crowd.

Sunday is World Water Day, so bloggers are highlighting water issues:

Ronnie Cohen at NRDC’s Switchboard [http://switchboard.nrdc.org/blogs/rcohen/follow_the_leader_thoughts_on.html] and Kevin Ferguson at Gristmill report from the World Water Forum, which is going on this week in Istanbul.
Melanie Nakagawa, also at Switchboard [http://switchboard.nrdc.org/blogs/mnakagawa/why_we_should_support_funding.html], emphasizes the economic benefits that clean water investments yield.
Robert Stavins, also at Gristmill [http://gristmill.grist.org/story/2009/3/16/81327/2246?source=rss], suggests approaching water management as an economic problem, and corrects some misperceptions about water pricing.

http://thepumphandle.wordpress.com/
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Weekly Toll - - http://weeklytoll.blogspot.com/
Death In The Workplace w/News & Updates
John Donne - ...any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.

Worker Electrocuted At Science Center - - March 13, Hartford, Conneticut - A man in his early 20s was killed while performing work on the new Connecticut Science Center Friday morning. Hartford police said the man was electrocuted while working on the center's HVAC system. He was employed by RCMS Controls, of Wallingford, which specializes in the systems. Witnesses said the worker was found slumped on the ground just after 8 a.m. They said it is unclear how he was shocked, but was working on the heating and air conditioning system in the area where there are electrical cables. The man was taken to Hartford Hospital after being given CPR at the site. He was pronounced dead at the hospital.

Worker killed in elevator accident - - March 13, Chelsea, Massachusetts - An employee of the State Garden produce market in Chelsea was killed Friday when an elevator fell on him. The 35-year-old was working in the elevator shaft when rigging meant to keep the elevator in place apparently gave way and crushed him at about 4 p.m. Police do not expect foul play, but state police and Suffolk County District Attorney Daniel F. Conley are investigating the case.

WEB EXCLUSIVE ... Construction worker dies after fall at OJR Middle School - - March 13, Washington, Pennsylvania - A construction company employee who fell from scaffolding at an Owen J. Roberts Middle School construction site Thursday morning died, officials confirmed Thursday afternoon. The deceased person's identity was not known by press time as it was not released by any officials who were reached for comment. When reached by phone, Lenny Uddybach, a spokesperson with the Occupational Safety and Health Administration, confirmed that OSHA "has initiated an investigation" into the fatal incident . However, she declined to provide details, indicating OSHA doesn't release details until its investigation is closed, a matter which would take up to six months to complete.

Worker crushed by 5-ton piece of steel - - March 12, Fort Worth, Texas - Police say a 56-year-old worker was crushed Thursday when a five-ton piece of steel fell from a crane he was operating at a Fort Worth steel mill. The Tarrant County Medical Examiner's office identified the man as Johnny Little of Joshua. The Dallas Morning News reports in its online edition Thursday that the accident happened about 6:20 a.m. at the Delta Steel mill in far south Fort Worth.

http://weeklytoll.blogspot.com
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NEVER FORGET! We're listing the names of our soldiers killed weekly. These records can be found at http://www.defenselink.mil/releases/

01. 1st Lt. Daniel B. Hyde, 24, of Modesto, Calif., died March 7 in Samarra, Iraq, of wounds sustained in Tikrit when an explosive device struck his unit vehicle. He was assigned to the 2nd Battalion, 35th Infantry Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team, 25th Infantry Division, Schofield Barracks, Hawaii.

02. Pfc. Patrick A. Devoe, II, 27, of Auburn, N.Y., died March 8 in Kandau Kalay, Afghanistan, of wounds suffered when his vehicle was struck by an improvised explosive device. He was assigned to the40th Cavalry Regiment4th Brigade Combat Team (Airborne), 25th Infantry Division, Fort Richardson, Alaska.

03. Lance Cpl. Patrick A. Malone, 21, of Ocala, Fla., died March 10 as a result of a non-hostile incident in Anbar province, Iraq. He was assigned to 2nd Tank Battalion, 2nd Marine Division, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.

04. Petty Officer 1st Class Theophilus K. Ansong, 34, of Bristow, Va., was lost at sea Feb 4. Ansong was assigned to USS San Antonio (LPD 17) as it conducted operations in the Gulf of Aden.

05. Staff Sgt. Timothy L. Bowles, 24, of Tucson, Ariz., died March 15 near Kot, Afghanistan, of wounds suffered when his vehicle encountered an improvised explosive device. He was assigned to the 3rd Logistics Readiness Squadron, Elmendorf Air Force Base, Alaska.

06. Staff Sgt. Archie A. Taylor, 37, of Tomball, Texas, died March 14 as a result of a non-hostile incident in Kabul province, Afghanistan. He was assigned to 2nd Intelligence Battalion, II MEF Headquarters Group, II Marine Expeditionary Force, Camp Lejeune, N.C.

07. The Department of Defense announced today the death of three soldiers who were supporting Operation Enduring Freedom. They died March 15th as a result of injuries sustained in Kot, Afghanistan, when an improvised explosive device detonated near their vehicle. They were assigned to the 1st Battalion, 178th Infantry Regiment, 33rd Infantry Brigade Combat Team, Woodstock, Ill.
Killed were:
08. Sgt. Christopher P. Abeyta, 23, of Midlothian, Ill.
09. Sgt. Robert M. Weinger, 24, of Round Lake Beach, Ill.
10. Spc. Norman L. Cain III, 22, of Oregon, Ill.
Cain died at the scene of the incident in Kot; Abeyta and Weinger were transported to Jalabad, Afghanistan, where they later died.

11. Spc. Gary L. Moore, 25, of Del City, Okla., died March 16 in Baghdad, Iraq, of wounds sustained when an explosive device struck his vehicle. He was assigned to the 978th Military Police Company, 93rd Military Police Battalion, Fort Bliss, Texas.
~
Soldier Missing From Korean War Is Identified


The Department of Defense POW/Missing Personnel Office announced today that the remains of a U.S. serviceman, missing from the Korean War, have been identified and will be returned to his family for burial with full military honors.

He is Sgt. 1st Class Patrick J. Arthur, U.S. Army, of Broken Bow, Neb. He will be buried on May 1 in Arlington National Cemetery near Washington, D.C.

Representatives from the Army’s Mortuary Office met with Arthur’s next-of-kin to explain the recovery and identification process on behalf of the secretary of the Army.

Arthur was a member of Headquarters Company, 2nd Battalion, 38th Regiment, 2nd Infantry Division. In mid May 1951, elements of the 2nd ID were securing their positions on the No Name Line south of the Soyang River, South Korea, when the Chinese Army launched a major counter-offensive. The 2nd ID was forced to withdraw south to a more defensible position north and east of the Hongch’on River. During the withdrawal, Arthur was captured by enemy forces on May 18, 1951, and was marched north into North Korea. Arthur died of malnutrition and disease in July, and he was buried at the Suan Mining POW Camp near Pyongyang.

Between 1991-94, North Korea gave the United States 208 boxes of remains believed to contain the remains of 200-400 U.S. servicemen. Accompanying some of the remains were Arthur’s military identification tag and a denture fragment bearing his name.

Among other forensic identification tools and circumstantial evidence, scientists from the Joint POW/MIA Accounting Command and the Armed Forces DNA Identification Laboratory also used mitochondrial DNA and dental comparisons in identifying some of the remains as Arthur’s.

For additional information on the Defense Department’s mission to account for missing Americans, visit the DPMO Web site at http://www.dtic.mil/dpmo or call (703) 699-1169.
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"We have nothing to fear but fear itself." -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
"There is not enough darkness in the world to put out the light of one candle."
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. - - George Carlin
"Stop telling God how big your storm is. Instead, tell the storm how big your God is!" - - Queen E. Watson
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Scheduled Activities
~~~
2009 Barksdale Air Show Defenders of Liberty Air Show, May 9-10 [http://www.barksdaleafbairshow.com/]
~~~
Men's Prayer Breakfast held every Tuesday morning at 6 AM in Miller's Cafeteria. If you aren't a regular participant at the Men's Prayer Breakfast, you're missing some great food, fellowship and inspired teaching of the Word. Hope to see you there.
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Emergency Phone Number 911
(Fire, Police, Ambulance, Sheriff, etc. )
Central Dispatch 234-5655
(Non - Emergency Number)
Direct Numbers
Ambulance - 234-7371 (24 Hour)
Jail - 234-5331 (24 Hour)
Poison Control - 800-222-1222 (24 Hour)
http://www. aapcc. org/
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Interested in getting in touch with the Banner-News through e-mail?
E-mail addresses for communicating with the newspaper’s various departments are: news@bannernews.net For news and sports items, Coming Events, Diary, Church News, school and civic events.
advertising@bannernews. net For retail and classified advertising.
circulation@bannernews. net To start, stop or cancel newspaper delivery or for comments about delivery.
outfitters @bannernews.net For Office Outfitters, the office supply division of the Banner-News.
[http://www.bannernews.net/]
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"Laugh whenever you can and cry if you need to." -- "Bug"
"I read the end of the book. We win!" -- "Bug"
"We may not be able to cure the world, but we don't have to make it sicker." -- "Bug"
"There just ain't enough fingers for all the holes in the dike." - - "Bug"
"It's no big deal doing what God tells you to do. A big deal would be NOT doing what God tells you to do. Just ask Jonah." - - Paul Troquille
“Nam et ipsa scientia potestas est.” Knowledge is power. - Francis Bacon
"The problem is here and now. The time for talk is past. The time for action is now."
Comments on the first Earth Day - James F. McClellan via John "Fuzzy" Thurman
~~~~~
Hope you enjoy the newsletter.
Again, thanks to all our contributors this week.
"Remember Pearl Harbor? Remember 9/11!" --"Bug"
God bless and GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
Job 16:19-21 Luke 22:59-62 Job 19:1-4 Luke 22:41-43 Gen 50:19-20 Luke 23:32-33 Luke 23:50-53 John 19:14-16 John 19:26-27 http://www.e-min.org/
God is Good and Faithful CU 73 IC JFM CSP NREMT-I KC5HII

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